The Power of Friendship

So, Valentine’s Day is coming up, and guess who’s single…again. Me. But, that’s ok! Because I have the support of such amazing friends, it makes Valentine’s Day a bit more bearable. So, this post is kind of different than my usual college this or college that. Today I’m going to be talking about what friendship has meant to me in the past year, especially since graduating high school. I felt that this would be good to go up a couple of days before Valentine’s Day because being single on Valentine’s Day can bring you down. I want to let all those single ladies (and guys) out there that you don’t need a relationship to be happy. Friends are really important, so show them some love this Valentine’s Day!

Friends. You can’t live without them, and sometimes, you can’t live with them. You know, I’ve learned a lot about myself and the relationships I have with people since entering the world of adulthood. I’ve learned who to keep in my life and who I just have to let go. I always struggle with the letting go part.

I’m one who holds on to moments and memories and I don’t want them to ever end. I don’t want what a person and I once had to ever fade. But, like Robby Stewart from Hannah Montana said, “Sometimes your friend is in your life for a reason, and sometimes they’re in your life only for a season.” I don’t think that’s the exact quote, but it’s something along those lines.

I value my friends. I appreciate everything they do and our silly little conversations and the fact that we have all of these inside jokes and agreements. I remember last summer, I got a text from my really good friend. All it was was a picture of a felt vegetable garden from Etsy with the quote “Now I know what I’m going to spend my $90 on.” To this day, we still joke about that felt vegetable garden.

Since graduating high school, I’ve really been able to see who my true friends are and who I was just “friends” with because we spent every day together for the better part of seven years. I was really able to tell who cared about me, who wanted to be in my life and, ultimately, who didn’t. Last semester a person came into my life for only for a short time, but in those few months, they really taught me a lot about accepting people and sometimes just having to let go. I learned that I have to stop fighting for people to be in my life. I can’t be putting in 130% of the effort into a friendship, let alone a relationship. If someone wants to be a part of your life, they will make the effort. I really had to learn to let go of the relationships where I was trying so hard to keep people in my life. It’s not fair to me (or you if you do this) nor is it fair to all of my other friends who I could be dedicating so much of my time to and enhancing those friendships.

They teach you in elementary school about the “Golden Rule.” Treat others the way you want to be treated. Even though I’m not arguing about who stole my crayon or who gets to be line leader for the day (did anyone else love this job??), the Golden Rule still holds true. Why be a negative influence on someone? Why pick petty fights? Why bring someone else down? I wouldn’t want someone to do that to me, so why do it to someone else? Instead, be the person in your friend’s life who keeps up with them. Be the person who will ask them how they’re doing at a random time during the day. Or, if you haven’t talked to them in a while, text them to see how they’ve been. Learn their life dreams, their goals, their ambitions. Learn their birthday, their favorite color, their favorite candy. Just let them know that you’re truly there to see them grow and be successful.

With all that said and done and with Valentine’s Day right around the corner, I challenge you to text someone (or even call them if you’re that brave and not like a majority of the people nowadays who are afraid of phone calls) and see how they’re doing. See how their life has been.

For me, especially as I’ve gotten older and I’ve spent more and more Valentine’s Days alone, I’ve really realized the true impact that a good friend has on my life. I’ve realized that, especially now, friendships are more important than relationships. So, this Valentine’s Day, I’m going to be spending it with my friends, having a great time, probably eating pizza, and being grateful that I have such amazing people in my life.

How are you spending Valentine’s Day? Are you spending it with a special someone, or are you going to be hanging out with your friends? Let me know!

-Abigail T.